Recap: The Hills - Oh, snap!!!

Heehee... Lauren refers to Jason as her "relationship from hell". This week, the gang gets ready for Heidi's birthday - which unfortunately includes toolbox Spencer. Audrina, however, is still in the doghouse.

Lauren goes on a lunch date with Brody. This one wasn't as awkward as their first date, but not by much. Brody's conversation opener - "How's your love life? Do you talk to Jason?" We then learn Brody had about a two week break between Kristen (Cavallari) and Nicole (Richie). Lauren tells him he needs to take a break between girls. (Oh... the mixed signals we girls love to send...) Brody confesses he's a cuddler so he's still looking for someone to cuddle with.

On to Audrina... who, by the way, has day-glo teeth. Audrina fills in her co-worker on the whole Heidi drama. She refers to Spencer as a "dirtbag" and a "pig". OK, she's all good in my book. We also learn interns never get in trouble at Epic Records.

So for Heidi's birthday, she decides to go for a Audrey Hepburn look complete with up-do plus crown and a black tutu. Um... OK... it's her birthday so let's go with it.

Oh, cool - Lauren got Heidi one of those photo cakes. And then there's Spencer - UGH! I get annoyed everytime I see him on the screen. Uh oh... trouble!!! Here comes Audrina and her posse. This is such a common occurence on both this show and LB. Why do these girls insist on attending events of other girls who clearly do not like them??? Regardless, Audrina tries her best to make amends with Heidi and while Heidi thanks her for coming, you could see the pain in her eyes that she did not want to deal with Audrina on her birthday. Unfortunately, Audrina persisted, until finally Heidi replied with an "Oh, snap!" and then runs away. (Which I sort of enjoyed because I like when anyone can incorporate "Snap!" in conversation. I never seem to have the opportunity myself...) Audrina complains to her friend that Heidi keeps blowing her off which Lauren's friend, Jen, interprets as trash-talking Heidi. Jen then seeks out Audrina and makes her feel like crap, which I didn't think Audrina really deserved. Personally, I find Jen annoying - even back in the LB days. Anyway, there's so much miscommunication going on there. I really don't think Audrina was trying to ruin Heidi's birthday - but maybe she shouldn't have picked that time to address their situation.

After giving up on Heidi, Audrina then arranges an awkward lunch meeting between herself and Lauren (who brings Whitney for support - or buffer?). They chat about the birthday night and the discussion doesn't really go anywhere. Whitney pipes in that maybe some girls are not meant to be friends. Well, that's a shame! Audrina closes the lunch by telling Lauren, "Well, just because Heidi and I can't be friends, it doesn't mean we still can't be." And Lauren's reaction pretty much clearly said, NOT!!!

On a separate nght, Lauren and Heidi go out to some club to meet up with Spencer and Brody. And what a coincidence, Audrina and her posse are there as well. This time she keeps her distance. One of her friends had one of the best quotes of the night, "Spencer is the ultimate cheese." Another funny moment of the night is when Spencer orders Jen off the couch so that Brody could "cuddle" with Lauren there. Obviously annoyed, Jen whines how that's OK because she just loves standing, yet the two lovey-dovey couples don't seem to notice. Eventually, Spencer and Heidi notice Lauren and Brody are gone...

Ooh... they're gone alright - back to Brody's condo!!! Man, he's smooth. He takes her out on his balcony and lays a big wet one on Lauren. I'm assuming this is their first kiss. How sweet! Oh, yeah, Brody, "you are a cheesyball!" Especially with lines like, "I love seeing you smile." He lays another one on her, but judging by the way Lauren kept backing away after each kiss, I don't think he got very far that night.

EWWW! Spencer and Heidi smooched, too. Ick - wish they didn't have to end it with that shot.

Next week, it looks like Heidi and Audrina will finally have a sit down AND Heidi will wise up to the sleazy behavior of her icky beau.